6 social media types we could do without — 8-Point Arc

We all have seen them and we've even been guilty ourselves.  Here is a (hopefully humorous) little rant on some signals that you might be annoying on social media.

 

The number of brands we have evaluated goes up every day. As part of the brands we have processed hundreds of thousands of social media posts.  In an effort to have a little fun, we present you with 6 business social media types we can do without.

 

Now, anyone that listens to our podcast knows I take my share of potshots at social media.  I get that it serves some legitimate purpose, but wow, there is a ton abuse of the social media system.  Many platforms (I’m looking at, you Twitter and Facebook) are the narcissistic equivalent of standing water propagating a mosquito colony.  

 

So without further delay, here are six things we can do without on the business use of social media:

 

1.) The humblebrag transitioned into a life lesson:

 

Oh, how I long for the days when social media narcissism could be labeled with simple terms like “humblebrag.”.   Social media narcissism has now become as complex as a series of moves we might see in an Olympic dive.  LinkedIn has now become the place to pull up chair, fill up your pipe and spin a thinly  veiled tale about your greatness with the life lesson of an Aesop Fable.  It usually goes something like this:

 

I was reminded the other day about a time I started a new job and inherited an employee that was being performance managed out of the business.  I was told to fire this employee, but I threw my body in front of their his cubicle and insisted I be allowed to formulate my own opinion.  That person is now a billionaire astronaut and called me the other day to thank me.  I didn’t do anything except lightly dust a little opportunity for them to flourish and become awesome as a result of my own awesome-ness.  Won’t you please comment,  tell me how great I am and bump my social media worth as my intent is to get a lot of comments.  The lesson for you: be awesome for awesome people so they can be awesome…or something like that.

 

2. The controversial a^%hole

 

Hey, I’m edgy. I tell it the way it is, and I use words like f^&k and s#!t because that’s edgy, man. I say things to just get a reaction; I don’t even believe half of them.  Feel free to comment that you don’t like me and my posts because that just means more comments for me! Angry comments are better than no comments! If you don’t hate me, then it must mean you love me, and people that love me are cool….because I’m f#^king edgy….man.

 

3. The scarlet letter bestowed with fake outrage

 

This is the (mostly) anonymous shaming of people that are, for the most part, doing their best in a complex world.  These posts go something like this:

 

Since when did it become okay to cold email me and call me by my first name? Shouldn’t people have enough respect to refer to me with a proper salutation? Since when did we all become so barbaric? Are you with me, people? If so, please leave lots of comments below so the LinkedIn algorithm thinks I’m really influential.

 

 

Please stop this.  Yes, there are people out there trying to sell you. Yes, there are people desperately trying to get a job.  Stop being so self righteous and judgmental.  And by the way, here’s a news flash for you:, you annoy people all the time. We all do. Its a crowded, chaotic world.

 

4. The quote peddler

 

This may be the most genius example of social media narcissism.  These are people that want to collect their social media influence (shares/likes/comments) fast and cheap.  So they just share brilliant quotes by other people…over…and over…and over again.  These quotes are almost always something pithy that we think is brilliant, only to forget 13 seconds later.  They are not interested in putting in anything pesky, like effort. It’s way easier to quote other people that put in effort.

 

“Man is only as brilliant as the quotes he steals from another man.”

 

There you go, use that one next time. 

 

5. The philosopher-izing game

 

The philosopher cites some topic, event or issue and provides some sort of pseudo- intellectual pre-amble and dramatically presents a question that would make Socrates blush.  The trick here is the question doesn’t really matter; it’s the delicate structure of the analysis and question that serve as the beautiful glass case showcasing the philosopher’s brilliance.  The open- ended question is just a manipulative game designed for you to try and match the philosopher’s brilliance and leave lots, and lots of comments; —which I like to call the twenty dollar bill of social media currency.

 

6. The hypocritical judge

 

Last and but not least, the judge. It’s not lost on me that by even publishing this post, I am by definition a player on the social media gameboard.  So, yes, I am the hypocritical judge. The guy calling out everyone else for their social media sins while committing one myself.  At least I admit it! :)

 

If you are selling a product or service you have to engage in social media.  We all devolve at some point into doing what it takes to get eyeballs and clicks.  I guess it’s the game us marketers are forced to play. So we do, but don’t love all of it all of the time. 

 

Well, maybe some do.

 

Author

 

Brian Dames

Co-founder

 

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